MOTHER’S LAW: If you set an important document in plain view, it *will* get colored on.
- Prepping for K/1st Grade! http://t.co/uVl02QH33y 17:06:28, 2013-05-29
- My 16-month-old little girl points at Julie Andrews as Mary Poppins and says “Mama.” I must be doing something right in this parenting gig! 15:59:27, 2013-05-30
- Caleb, of his own volition, made a model of what it’d look like if someone didn’t go poop or potty for 3 days. Yeah. It looked like that. 11:40:47, 2013-05-31
- Some nursery rhymes are a bit too close to home. “Old woman who lived in a shoe” & “Snakes & snails & puppy dogs’ tails,” I’m looking @ you. 16:12:43, 2013-05-31
- Any kindness I've had toward the cat is hereby revoked. She made a snack of over 100 plants grown & readied for planting this week. 🙁 12:06:27, 2013-05-20
- No one is allowed to teach Louritta how to properly pronounce "amen" because I want her to end prayers with "EBay!" for as long as possible. 11:16:28, 2013-05-23
- Looks like "My Kids Forgot to Wear Shoes" season has officially started. 15:00:13, 2013-05-15
- Told the boys I saw a raccoon in our back yard late last night. Jack slipped me his light saber: "…so you can get him if he comes back." 15:26:41, 2013-05-16
- Just finished a new site for the amazing @BrittanysPantry. Stop by for her launch giveaway & to show some food love! http://t.co/GirS113ODx 23:53:27, 2013-05-19
- ME: If you drink your milk, you'll get big and strong like Superman!
JACK: I don't want to be like Superman, I want to be like Grandpa! 14:10:48, 2013-05-02
- Also, JACK: "I have blonde hair, Caleb has brown hair, and my dad has no hair… just lots of pokes on his head." 14:12:07, 2013-05-02
- Caleb freaked.
JACK, (rubbing his back): "You *can* calm down. Take a deep breath. Breathe with me. In. Out. Good."
CALEB: "Thanks, Bud." 15:34:47, 2013-05-04
- Thankful for Jack today. "Mom, you have a nice butt! It's big and squishy, just like an elephant!" Thanks, buddy. I feel better now. 10:36:46, 2013-04-24
- CALEB: Give me flying rocket blasters! If you do, I *might* explode, if you don't, I *will* explode. Ask yourself, which is more inevitable? 10:40:55, 2013-04-24
- JACK: (loudly) "If you don't give Caleb rocket blasters, you will be devoid of all value!" (whispers) "Caleb told me to say that." 12:50:31, 2013-04-24
- WHY PARENTING IS AWESOME: Jack cries that he wants to go upstairs. I bring him up. He immediately cries that he doesn't want to be upstairs. 11:41:25, 2013-04-25
- CALEB + SUGARY CEREAL: "You shouldn't feed this to us. It won't help us grow big and strong. I'd expect Dad to feed it to us, but not you." 17:28:29, 2013-04-25