"Jack, what is this?"J: "Oh, that's my pocket treasure."
06/08/2014
C: Don’t worry, Mom. We’ll be less disgusting when we’re older. And we won’t have toys then, we’ll replace them with the pain of hard work.
JACK: “When I’m big, I’m going to buy a house, paint it black, fill it with wolves, & rent a moon. I will be the Scary House Guy.” #ambition
ME: When you’re taller then me, you’ll help care for me and keep me safe, right?
CALEB: What!? I’ll have my own wife. You can call the army.
CALEB: “Tell me if this storyline is plausible. Would a mom name her newborn Dirt Sneeze? …No? *whispers* Dirt Sneeze is allergic to dirt.”