Loose Ends

05/23/2007

Well, today was supposed to be the day I had all of my master’s work done. But, for a variety of reasons, it’s just not quite there yet. I had three classes that had loose ends, and was only able to finish off one of them yesterday. So, I have two left to go. I have started the work, outlined it, and begun developing it. It’s just not done.
I feel so tired of school work and disheartened that I couldn’t meet this goal. I miss bionic Stephanie who could just work for hours on end and get things done. Now I’m distracted, tired Stephanie.
So, while others have already started offering congratulations to me, I know that I’m technically not done. I will get to walk at graduation on Saturday since I have enough done that my professors know I should be finished soon. However, it will feel phony and non-elating. I love graduating when everything is actually done and you can smile the big smile and feel the huge sense of relief along with everyone else. I will have no such feeling.
So, now the plan. How am I going to finish this degree, wrap up the school year for my real job, and plan for my two summer jobs (one teaching a technology institute for teachers and the other teaching English Language Learners)? We’ll see.
I’m trying to stay positive. I mean, I got one class done, right? Just gotta keep the focus and run a little longer… I see the finish line, I just didn’t think it would be up such a steep hill.