I am an artist & teacher with a ❤ for visual expression, educational methodology, homesteading, & Jesus. My geek-love is The Joshua and we have three peanut-butters: Caleb, Jack, & Louritta.

Chillin, Chillin, Mindin My Business

01/13/2005

I’ve been feeling pretty good lately. I think I did a good job setting boundaries by not saying yes to more activities than I could handle. I have a plan to finish my National Board stuff and, if all goes well, I think I can pass it. I’ve also been getting a bit more sleep and learned how to make some really good Americanos with my espresso maker. That’s a nice little pick-me-up in the morning!
I’ll be teaching one class of Drama next semester, which will be quite interesting. I’m still trying to nail down the best way to organize the semester, but I think it should go really well.
I’ve also been considering other bizarre things I’d like to do with my life. I think it would be cool to join the Peace Corp or something weird like that when I have the financial stability to retire. I’d like to live in some other country and learn another language. I’m considering trying out some modeling for the heck of it. I dunno…life is a weird thing and I just want to try out a bunch of stuff. Why not?
Josh is working on creating a studio space for me in the garage. I’m pretty pumped about it. I have some paintings in my head that have been dying to come out. I’ll be able to devote much more time to them once my Nat. Board stuff is done.

Digging Out of the Pile

01/08/2005

I’m not majorly stressed feeling right now. I went to bed at like 7:00 yesterday because I was so exhausted. It feels kind of lame to be going to bed so early on a Friday night. Anyway, it seems like everything has been piling up in my life and I’m not really digging it. (Heh heh…that was a funny unintended pun.) I have my National Board Certification stuff due at the end of March. And that’s a TON of work. I have my final technology project due April 1st…but I’m nearing completion of that. I am making a DVD of my school with a fellow teacher and that’s due at the end of February. Plus, the semester is over at my school in two weeks so that means that I have an insane amount of grading and parent contacts to do, not to mention all of the preparation for the beginning of next semester’s classes. My school has me teaching Drama for the first time next semester so that means I have to pick up another prep and develop that curriculum. I have my Jr. High group on Tuesday nights…but we cut them down to only twice a month until April. And I also have random times I need to speak to groups about my technology project to show integration of technology into education. Seems I’ve become a bit of an expert in that area. Then there are the regulars of grocery shopping, laundry, cooking, cleaning, and all that.
And the hardest part is that I’ve been feeling pressure to paint. I haven’t painted since October…which is a long time for me. And I have so many ideas walled up in my head that want to get out, but they keep getting pushed back to get all of this other junk done. Oh, and what was a shoddily put-together studio space in the garage is now piled with stuff. We rearranged the living room and some unused stuff got set out there, the patio furniture got brought in from the rain, then all this other stuff just kind of got set down somewhere because we were in a hurry or couldn’t reach the place it was actually supposed to go or whatever. I’ve worked out an agreement with Josh (and some extra funds) to put a cabinet w/ two drawered cabinets out there (forming a work bench), as well as a peg board. This would bring some order. I’m also thinking of painting it a soft purpley-gray color to give it a feeling of serenity. I’d like to find some used, cheap-ola carpet to lay on the front half where I work. It’d be a really great space to work in.
Oh, and then there’s surfing. Being so dependent on the tides and my schedule it’s become nil.
I’m really hoping that this summer my “job” is to paint and surf. That’d be awesome considering all the stuff that I’m having to pile-drive through right now. It’d be a good goal to set my sights on. We’ll have to see how the mula works out for that one though.

Home away from Earth

12/28/2004

God has really been impressing on my heart the past few weeks a joy and desire for heaven. I love the earth, but knowing that heaven is even greater blows my mind. I used to really be afraid of the thought of eternity (it is still a bit scary). I mean, it seems odd that I will never just cease to exist, which in some ways would be kind of a relief. But, the thought of eternity in heaven. That’s a big thought.
Awhile ago I expressed to Josh my fear of eternity and said that I’d rather just cease to exist. He said, “Maybe you’re underestimating what God has prepared for us.” That got me thinking. What could God create that would be so cool that I would want to live for eternity…that eternity would be an awesome thing and not a scary thing? What will heaven be like?
When I saw the movie What Dreams May Come, I saw a hell that really frightened me. I mean, if hell was like that, I certainly did not want to be there. That would not be a pleasant place to be for a minute, let alone an eternity. But, the heaven…that was a place that I could be. I mean, I know the movie has some issues theologically and I also know that my human self cannot fathom the greatness of heaven or of the mind of God and what he has prepared for us. But, if heaven is anything like how it is in that movie… sweet. Sign me up.
Last year in my small group, one of our Bible study topics (from Lies Women Believe) was that God is not like our earthly fathers. Some of the girls in my group had absent or “bad” fathers, so this was a good topic to discuss. But, I found myself thinking that if God was, for some reason, exacltly like my earthly father, faults included, that I would be overjoyed. And it blew my mind to know that God was even better than my earthly dad. And it got me really wanting to know Him more and wondering what it will be like to spend eternity with Him.
I also know that heaven will be a great place of worship. And there are so many ways to worship God. And I was looking at all of the ways that I worship God on earth – through singing, through relationships, through prayer, through sports, through art…so much! And it delights me to know that in heaven I will have no fear of death and no tears and will live eternally in worship with my Lord.
Revelation 21:1-4
Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

Top 41 Movies

12/26/2004

Long in the waiting…I have finally come up with my personal top 41 list of movies, in order, as it is today (Dec. 26th, 2004). There are other movies that I loved and thought were visually stunning or mentally stimulating, but that just didn’t connect with me personally. These are the movies that I’ve quoted, recalled, pondered, and thought more and more about. They’ve impacted my attitudes and thoughts and relationships in some way. They have made me think more deeply about character, acting, art, visuals, humor, social standing, history…and all that good stuff. They have encouraged me to imagine and dream; they have entertained me through some bad illnesses. Some are classics and some are…well, they’re just plain cheesy. But, sometimes even the cheesy movies stay with us and whisper to us and impact us. Obviously, in my young life there are many movies I have not yet experienced, and my current Netflix Queue is over 200. But considering the ones I have seen and the impact they’ve had on me, (without further adieu) here is my top 41.
1. Nashville
2. High Fidelity
3. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
4. Persona
5. Sense and Sensibility
6. Spirited Away
7. Singin’ in the Rain
8. The Jerk
9. Whale Rider
10. Life is Beautiful
11. Mary Poppins
12. Lost in Translation
13. Being John Malkovich
14. Amelie
15. 2001 A Space Odyssey
16. A River Runs Through It
17. Punch-Drunk Love
18. The Pianist
19. American Splendor
20. The Little Princess
21. X-Men
22. The Wizard of Oz
23. Adaptation
24. Strictly Ballroom
25. Legally Blonde
26. Lord of the Rings, Return of the King
27. The Color of Paradise
28. In America
29. Frida
30. Pirates of the Caribbean
31. What Dreams May Come
32. An Ideal Husband
33. Dr. Strangelove or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
34. Best in Show
35. Muriel’s Wedding
36. Monsoon Wedding
37. That Thing You Do!
38. Duets
39. Rain Man
40. Knights Tale
41. Grosse Point Blank

My Family is Like Shifting Sand…

12/23/2004

It’s changed by every wave.
It’s only during the holidays that I see how much my family has changed, no, morphed over the years. The family I knew as a child has been reduced, expanded, and scandalized. As a kid, my family consisted of my aunts & uncles, cousins, grandparents, and, of course, my parents & brothers. But, after a bit of adultery here, some unbearable addictions or abuses there, marriage, divorce, and addition of new children, it seems that the picture of my family today wouldn’t even be recognized as being the same family I had as a kid.
I remember when I found out my uncle was getting a divorce. I was ten or so, and was so mad at my aunt for not coming to say goodbye to me. I remember that I had confessed to her (by whispering in her ear, so others would not hear) that she was my favorite aunt. Then, her & my uncle were divorced and I never saw her again. As an adult, I recognize that the whole thing was messy and that she was not obligated to say anything to her niece, but I do remember how it tore me apart at the time. That was the first change I ever saw in my family.
From then on there have been several divorces (and many name changes for some of the women…I can’t even keep track anymore) and remarriages. Several of which include step kids and whatnot joining in to the family. They are accepted and loved, but then the next year comes around and they don’t come to Christmas anymore because of another divorce.
I told my dad today that I was amazed at how much our family had changed. I said that I never expected it to be such an evolving, constantly changing thing. I mean, as a kid, I thought that family was a rock, it was solid. It would change, sure, due to marriage & death & new children being born. But, that was it…and it’s core would remain stable throughout time. My parents have been stable, and the only changes to my immediate family have been mine & my brother’s spouses.
I guess it has changed my image of family. I have an ideal in my mind about what I’d like it to be, how stable I want it to be, and how Disney I’d like it to feel each Christmas. But, that doesn’t seem to happen anymore and I’m better off just accepting the truth. Families are like shifting sand. They change with every wave.

PH33R CURV35!!!

12/13/2004

Here’s my bit of local news, along with a note of sympathy to my dear, sweet husband.
When we moved into our new place, there was a cute pizza parlor across the street called Bruschetta’s. It was a home-town Italian bistro where families and teams would meet after sports games or after long bike rides. Josh’s den had a window that faced that direction and he insisted that his desk be placed overlooking the view. On many summer nights, Josh watched the people chatter outside of the bistro while working his Internet magic.
Then, the owner of Bruschetta’s died suddenly of a heart attack and the place was up for sale. We wondered what would become of the property. We worried that it could potentially be sold to a business that would drag down the neighborhood. Or, even worse, they could put in a Starbucks and drag down our wallet. We hoped it would be something delightful, preferably if it aided us when we didn’t feel like cooking.
They put in a Curves. It’s a workout place only for women that offers circuit training. And, not trying to be mean in any way, because this just happens to be true, all of the women I know who do Curves are overweight. And, you know, it’s really good for them to be working out. But, Curves, as far as I have seen, isn’t the kind of place that attracts young, athletic women. It’s for women with, you know, curves. And when I say “curves,” I mean morbidly overweight. I mean…one of their pantlegs could be worn as a skirt by many other women I know. I mean…well, let’s just leave it at “curvy,” because I think that’s still a politically correct term and sounds better than me using phrases like “semi-truck” and “make a better house than a doorway.”
So, Josh was gone to Bible study tonight, when I heard this horrible racket. The sides of the house were starting to vibrate a bit as someone’s bass was pumping a bit too much. I figured it was from some teenager whose stereo system was worth more than the car it was in. But, the sound just continued. So, after a little investigation, I found that the closest I could get to the sound was in Josh’s den, by Josh’s desk. I opened up the window shades by Josh’s desk only to see the excited new Curve’s owners testing out their new equipment. The music was blasting and, boy were they excited. Trouble is, these women are also…well…curvey. In fact, the whole scene looked like something straight out of a Gary Larson cartoon.
Then it dawned on me. Josh’s window no longer overlooks the quaint Italian bistro. It now overlooks every woman who chooses to work out at Curves. And their…ah-hem…hard at work curviness.
Have a good time trying to concentrate, Sweetie. 🙂

I Wike 2 Do Dwaw-wings

12/13/2004

Okay, so I said I’d post the link to the still life drawings my students did when they were up on our gallery, so here they are! You can click on the smaller pictures to enlarge them, which I think does them so much more justice. These are all begining Art students and their progress was amazing. Some of my favorites are the ones done by: Bhavi, Christina, Dasi, Diane, Leonard, Song, Tina, Vivian, and Yeana. Many of the students are English language learners or special ed. I wish I could put a picture of their first drawings next to their still lifes so you could see how much they improved. But, alas, I must draw the line somewhere!
You may also want to check out the oil paintings my level 2 students just finished. They turned out pretty decent for a first stab at oil painting.
Woo hoo!

New Year’s Resolutions (A Work in Progress…)

12/12/2004

I usually don’t make New Year’s resolutions. They always seem so cheesy and the people around me never seemed to keep them. But, then I thought about my life and things I’d like to improve on and maybe accomplish. So, here’s my list (in progress) of New Year’s Resolutions:
– Get out surfing at least twice a month during the winter months and four times a month during summer months.
– Get my National Board of Professional Teaching Certification
– Play for another season of Volleyball
– Finish reading the New Testament by March
– Finish the paintings I’ve started
– Avoid getting over-extended by not saying “yes” to more social obligations than I can handle
– Eat out less and prepare healthier meals more consistently
– Work out at least three times a week (volleyball and surfing count as working out)
– Strengthen my arm & shoulder muscles to help avoid volleyball & surfing injuries
– Add the art portfolio and writing/poetry section to my website
– Seek out practical ways that I can spoil and show love to my husband
– Continue seeking God and relying on him for my needs
– Bring down our debt as much as we can, get credit report & learn more about achieving financial stability
– Set up my studio space & darkroom, have a studio-warming party to mark the opening & let people develop pictures and make art
– Travel somewhere I haven’t been with friends
Well, that’s what I thought of… I’d love to see others make lists too! It’s fun to see what direction people are aiming to take in their lives.

Live Openly and Expansively!

12/12/2004

2 Corinthians 6:1-13
1Companions as we are in this work with you, we beg you, please don’t squander one bit of this marvelous life God has given us. 2God reminds us,
I heard your call in the nick of time;
The day you needed me, I was there to help.
Well, now is the right time to listen, the day to be helped. 3Don’t put it off; don’t frustrate God’s work by showing up late, throwing a question mark over everything we’re doing. 4Our work as God’s servants gets validated–or not–in the details. People are watching us as we stay at our post, alertly, unswervingly . . . in hard times, tough times, bad times; 5when we’re beaten up, jailed, and mobbed; working hard, working late, working without eating; 6with pure heart, clear head, steady hand; in gentleness, holiness, and honest love; 7when we’re telling the truth, and when God’s showing his power; when we’re doing our best setting things right; 8when we’re praised, and when we’re blamed; slandered, and honored; true to our word, though distrusted; 9ignored by the world, but recognized by God; terrifically alive, though rumored to be dead; beaten within an inch of our lives, but refusing to die; 10immersed in tears, yet always filled with deep joy; living on handouts, yet enriching many; having nothing, having it all.
11Dear, dear Corinthians, I can’t tell you how much I long for you to enter this wide-open, spacious life. 12We didn’t fence you in. The smallness you feel comes from within you. Your lives aren’t small, but you’re living them in a small way. 13I’m speaking as plainly as I can and with great affection. Open up your lives. Live openly and expansively!

The Messge, Copyright © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson
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